Writer/director/auteur Darren S. Aronofsky is set to helm his next feature, The Leftie, with one hand tied behind his back. Aronofsky is rumored to have penned the first draft of the script on an Underwood typewriter using only his left hand.

"There's nothing like awards season to remind me that I once found this craft challenging and engaging," Aronofsky confided in an acquaintance, "but now I find the work pedestrian and this constant rain of accolades tiresome."

"The prospect of working with a genius director is exciting," said Roger Bloom, a veteran Steadicam operator who lost his right hand last year in an accident with a Warner Bros. forklift. "It looked like my Steadicam career was over until Aronofsky came calling last week. My agent told me he asked for me specifically. He asked for me, the one-armed, left-handed Steadicam operator. I still can't believe it."

Not everyone in Hollywood is excited about Aronofsky's innovations. In particular, Ted Mundorff, Landmark Theatre's CEO and head film buyer, was none-too-pleased to find out that Aronofsky was planning a technological revolution in independent cinema. "We just went through an expensive transition to digital 3D exhibition," said Mundorff, "and now Aronofsky has demanded we retrofit all of our arthouse theatres with left armrests. This is an art movie, a character study about a left-handed card player. The existing right armrests already installed throughout our chain of cinemas should be more than sufficient for this film."

Aronofsky is repped by Craig Gering at CAA.